why do i find friends so hard to keep?

but it's probably a fault in my part for not pouring in any effort.
without effort, how can one expect to be rewarded right?

but i find that i put too much blame on myself anyway. Anything bad happens, i'll always find my own faults first, which can be good and bad at the same time.
a friendship has to have 2 parties to pour in the effort.
tepuk sebelah tangan takkan ada bunyi

no matter, the fault for my situation still lies with me mostly. i know i must change but change is so hard to do. i find it quite exhausting until i just wave the white flag.
and it's ironic that whenever i try, i just end up feeling more upset.
vicious cycle indeed.

so the question is, to try harder? or just not to care anymore?

(anyone notice how many times i contradict myself? just count the number of "but"s. this is my thought process anyway. always contradicting myself)

My future dog.
From here (yeen's blog)

today is a down day.
down down down

maybe tomorrow shall be an up day.
hopefully.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
ok. overdued but i should show off my birthday gifts soon. ahahahahahahha
first of all, i shall show off sabrina's cause her gift is special :D
she gave me this:
well... not really this but it's a diy kit to make this. so basically the kit contains all the materials. when i first open the box... it was really all raw materials (eg: pieces of wood, random thread, pieces of felt, wire, paper, foil sticker, etc) and no instructions. which is good in a way... i just let my imagination and common sense run wild.

i think she meant for me to do it when i was free (holidays) not when i'm supposed to be studying endocrine. ah well... to excited about stuff like this so naturally i poured all everything and started working on it yesterday.
And today... it's completed!

I added my own quirks cause

• i made a mess and had to cover that up
• i used up the materials inside the box
• cause i'm nerdy in that way :P

Before assembling everything together:

Name tag beside for size comparison. look at the mess i did :( The yellow paint suddenly had a life of its own and jumped out from the bottle. ah well... it gives the vibe of messy students. a real classroom would have shoe prints instead of yellow paint on its walls.
check out the erm... redboard. hahahaa. it's sandpaper!!! cause the original blackboard (which is basically a picture of a blackboard that was printed and you're supposed to cut it out and stick it) was a mess thanks to the yellow paint, i covered it up with sandpaper. good thing about sand paper is that chalk writes smoothly on it. so its really chalk!!!
(excuse my super nerdiness here. darn. i should have wrote more fabulous stuff like fashion designing or something)
Anatomy man!!! obviously printed by muah. no company can be this nerdy

Pituitary diagram!!! and a closer look at my failed attempt to draw the pituitary too

Some tong with rice thing inside with it's ladle. hahahaha.. i made it so the ladle would hook on :D

Ladle on
Ladle off!
I love to play around with this. the white bag is actually a functional drawstring bag!
the red bagpack is partially functional. basically just a pocket. but i added an outer pocket too. closer pic shall come
nerdiness reigns supreme here

i love the little pencils. again... an innovation by me. just chopsticks with the ends sharpened then coloured with markers. had to use a tweezer to hold them
Closer look at OHCM :D (ohcm- oxford handbook of clinical medicine). It's 1 cm in height. and the cover is pretty detailed. i finished up the backcover and spine in photoshop since google images yield no results

Darn light. This is Marieb my friends. hahahahahahhahaa. 8th edition somemore. (for those of you who don't hv a clue, Marieb is our textbook in IMU) I changed the authors name. Squint if you have to. The backcover and spine also completed in photoshop. had a lot of fun editing them since i could put all the random information i wanted. Inside pages are blank of course. Don't have time to print them out and stick them.

Size comparison. (note: black dot on my hand is a scab. i ter-kepit my hand in my gate's lock. silly me)
Food tray! Milk carton and some rice stuff with a pink thing and a pair of chopsticks!!!

Other plate i just cincai make(if u see the original pic on top, we are supposed to just roll up the felt and imagine that it's food). orange thing supposed to be wantan, yellow triangles- samosa (miss the samosa in smksj. horribly oily though)

Size comparison again. The tray.... was a pain

Then i put it all together with the frame... and TADAH:

Cluttered... yes i know
Background map is an aussie map of the great ocean road. i think it's pretty interesting cover for my notice board

The drawstring bag contains some random rolled up paper. Marieb is in the drawer, OHCM in the bag with the pencils.
Closer look at the bag. So cute right!!

OHCM. front, back and spine. see... even got barcode

No need to squint anymore.... I think the authors' name shows up pretty well here

Okay.. i added a few names here as well... see if you can spot them. don't spoil your eyesight though

Spine!

So fun! I haven't actually stick anything to the frame yet cause i still like playing with them.
The frame is currently pinned to my notice board (it's so light a single thumbtack can support its weight). Any knock will bring all the stuff crashing down on to my bed. Hopefully I won't be so clumsy :D

Labels: DIY mini shop